WHEN AM ANGRY..../MY REBELLION

I am kinda mad right now, nah not really mad, maybe angry will be the right definition to one of my closest friends in my entire life. I dunno if he is aware of it, at least maybe he kinda knows that he has kinda hurt me....but what he don't know I truly missed him and Iam just waiting for his apologies, and everything will be okay.
But I guess he isnt aware that he has done me enough to really apologize, I know him well, he is not the type that will run his way to just say duh...sorry friend....
Anyways, I havent been speaking to him or even messaging him in ym the past few weeks, when Iam online....or even texting him on his globe roaming...I even deleted his number on my phone the moment he texted me to stop forwrding messages at his phone since he always ran out of space whenever I send those multiple messages.....
I know he did not mean harm...I know he kinda not really put it that way...but Iam so much sensitive enough that day that he should have said thank you first and explain that he doesnt want to be deleting messages since his phone doesnt have enough memory.
But I was so hurt with what he texted....before he used to liked it...now, I dunno, maybe he is really inlove with his current gf...nah, am not inlove with my friend...it's a no-no rule for us...it's just everytime he gets involve with a a girl and is inlove he kinda forgets me. I understand, what I just don't understand is why he doesn't know how I feel..till now.
Nothing I just miss him, I wonder why most of my friends who is attached kinda forget me and when they have this love quarrls or whatevers..Iam always there...nah, am not sourgraping or blabbering them bout it...I mean there should be balance, other people most especially your significant others should sometimes be a welcome to our friendship...I hope I haven't loss a friend if in any case he found the one.
Just incase you're reading this..am sorry if I completely annoyed you that Saturday morning..but you kinda annoyed the sensitive side of me friendster......I deleted your globe roaming number, but not our friendship, am just waiting for you to explain things....wateva!......

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Probably you think am such angry person and even so with one of my friends to date..am not...usually when I get mad or even angry I just keep quiet, I hate confrontations, and nagging, and saying things you don't really mean. Yeah it happens when you're angry, all you wanna do is just get even, speak up, shout and most of the time really hurt big time the other person. I have had one experience I will never ever forget that made me extra careful when dealing with anger.

I regret the day that I said things to the very person I adored and love till now...(nah not my ex) I was just angry and said things really really bad.....so after we had patched things, and afterwards, I promised myself never ever do it again, to never say anything especially when you're angry or arguing....I will have to wait till my mind is clear and cool....

Or even have this.....



Yeah, am crazy, sometimes I guess I have this crazy rebellion on tatoos...one of the reason why I had this done last summer was to flaunt it on my friendster account and have him see that I can do whatever I want without his approval anymore....hahah...he actually texted me that day he found out I got a henna tatoo...and told me I have changed! Duh....I did! I really did change man, after you funked with my heart you fool!!!! Hahaha..sorry, am kinda angry......

It'sjust henna I know but before, it was a no-no on my skin, but what the heck...people change...things change...so...what the heck.....


And last July, after recieving a phone call a few hours befor his big day I did this.....




I refused to cry or be miserable that day, so instead, with my 2 sistahs and my cuzin Jason, I actually had again a henna done on my upper right arm. Nobody knows how hurt Iam that day, or even angry at things at situations, at him...so I just had it inside, and I actually made something so far from my being, trying to be tough and giving it a symbol in the long run.

Well, the tatoos are all gone now...but I guess my pain hasn'tdisappeared yet.
In time maybe...maybe.