watever

well lately i have not been posting any of my thoughts because iam afraid i will just blurt out all sad issues in my life...not that it means less of my life...i just want to be happy bout my life and all that's why....
well to tell you bout some bad news...and this is for the headlines..remember the 2 cousins i have just and chantal? they were taken away by their mother without permission from my aunt's place...she did that on purpose to really have her kids back...and iam so mad because she is the most irresponsible mother that i know,she went away four years ago and tried to hide her pregnancy from another man...and left her 2 very young kids then with her grandmother of 85 years...i know this is such a shameful story in the family but, i dont care we were not the ones who made their life miserable its her...
so to make my long story short we decided to have the kids live with us for 2 years since the dad is working abroad,and since am not working that time...i was the one most of the time with the kids...i tendered to their things,tutored them with their assignments at school,tried to pacify with their moods, buy things they need from their clothes to watever, and attend pta meetings at school..all i did without hesitation or watever because i love them as my own.
having them in my life at a point where i dunno where am i turning has been such a great experience, it was at that time i don't have confidence in my life...i was a bum, i hate my life then, i felt so so miserable and worthless and so useless, but then they came and i felt like, hey things are better with them, they make me smile, simple things like movies, and pancit canton for a merienda makes them happy..and that is when i realized that i dont have to feel bd about my life, they are just kids and thay have been through a lot of pain and misery...
and i also realized that i have to love my life then because thay depend on me most of the time...and that i should be strong and courageous..they taught me simple things will definitely make u happy despite life's twists, you have to be tough and be strong and stay thankful for what we got.
i was a mother for them esp chantal, the youngest, she was a very sick little girl but i tried to be brave and tough when she has an asthma attack.she was a very little girl who needs a lot of attention ad i triedmy best not to be a mother but try to make her feel like she did not lost her mom,for more than 2 years i tried everything to please her and her brother, but i guess things happen for a reason...
what am just ranting ryt now is that i wish they are okay and not be botheres so much by these things...it has been a trauma for them and just as when things are going okay that irresposible mother is taking them away from us...
watever your reason is ( to the mom) i just wish you wish well to your kids...and that dont be so so selfish...i know ure happy that thay are with you now but while they are with you...try to be a mother in the true sense of the word...
be a mom and love them.....
i bet you wont.....
but try
watever

 
my current mood is ranting and hot in with temper to some bitch gurl