On my last day being hmmmsomething hahahah....i dunno if i feel bad that am old and single or am old and not being able to see what my real future is. the truth of the fact is, i feel so sad that my life is becoming a routine of sorts, i work, i go malling, i go to the internet, i get tired and sleep and then work again the next day and if iam lucky, go to the mall, grab a bite, roam around and be happy...and then again am back on this 4 walled room and try to get some sleep.
iam so damn tired trying to figure out what my future really is, what i really wanna do, and if iam in right track, and if iam why does it feel so sad at all..and not only sad...empty and so shitty useless.
am not bragging mainly about being single..well ok sort of...it's just the past couple of weeks 3 of my ex's tried to talk to me...through text, chat and yeah one is in manila and tried to talk to me up front and wanted to get back with me...but i said no waaaaaaaay jose! iam not that desperate as well...and im still sane heheh...ythe truth of the matter is...i just dont feel good about everything, am back to my plain old sad and sappy dee one more time.
am bragging about how my life use to be so well-planned, so favorable a lot of times and in a snap it will just fade like that...it's ruining my ideals as a youth,(nde n ko youth eheheh)i was such a daughter that my parents were proud of, kse i did everything to make them proud, i studied so well, i set aside love and my own hapiness just to get to where i wanna be..problem is am not having that goals that i used to have....am not even hissing the thought to even try to go out of the country and do what i wanna do..and be a physical therapist that i should be...am so insane...to think they have invested a lot in me and am not even doing anything to try to work on my goals
i wanna know how to start...i dont wanna wait another year and still whine and blog about it next year.hopefully am not in manila by that time, hopefully am in that bloody country and working a lot and having a lot of bloody money....
here's wishin an uber UK hapiness in the months to come.
i need a change of state,place and country i guess to try to change my so old life here in Manila...
Kuya, kunin mo na ko quick!!!!!
Happy birthday to me .....a few hours and am so old na.....huhuhuhuhu
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