Nuthin am just thinking bout....my life...my freaking routinary life.....i work...go home..sleep...go to the internet..watch tv...go to the mall if I have an extra cash...dine or have coffee...and then go to work again...the next day would be the same...either way....i know what to expect....
Am just freakin bored...my lifestyle is just too unbearable now...I know I laugh, Iam happy but when Iam all alone...I just literally get lost.
Nuthin to do...nuthin to say....Iam just asking what my life would be the next few days or weeks.Usually I know what my fall back will be..but now...I actually can't tell...or even predict. Iam so damn afraid to be falling out of options...and the drive to strive to be a better indie is not on my heart now...ayh wtf!!!
Me and Cressy had coffee and talk about life...lovelife..hehe like I do have hehe..yea am dating but he is kinda busy with his life as well, and something in him made me change my mind about going to the next level. When it comes to love right now I better be sure of what I feel....I still set standards...of course hehe...I was about to give in when the unexpected happened,now I dunno what to feel anymore...what to tell him in a few days when he is ready to talk...
And oh my God, bout my work....I am so not liking it now....one day I think about quitting the next day will be to still continue and try harder to like it a bit...Iam so close to my team mates and they are the friends I turn to when I am literally down and and out....and the past few days am just not so liking what the set up is for us...so am beginning to think bout really quitting.....
I know I should a thousand times still think about what I really want and what to do...and also what my life should be...I know I should strive harder but the things around me, the people that i so trust is not forcing me to be better,talk bout blaming others...
hehe yah I know I am to blame for feeling so useless and outcasts....
Am just wanting answers to this paranoia....
Am lost....
dunno wat to do.....
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